Have you ever gotten so embroiled in a book you couldn't put it down and when you did you could swear you just got done watching an episode of some show because the details were that vivid? Happened to me yesterday. No workout, no food, no cleaning, just ENVY. I read until my hands actually hurt from gripping the book. Made tea and alternated between holding the warm cup and the book. I finished it in less than a day.
Envy is such a great topic, everyone has something another person covets. Human nature. On TV, movies, real life we all want something another person has, just to what extent will we go to get it. Normal, I think we can generalize this, see something they want and try and attain it by setting there own personal goals. The non-normal take at any means which is usually the easiest route and the most harmful to the person who has. And then there is the lazy, the ones who may want something but don't want to put in the effort to achieve in either way.
I was thinking about this last night when I couldn't sleep about how this all relates to relationships, family, friends, girlfriends and boyfriends. The dominate will dominate and the weak follow. The lucky few have wonderful communication and project out loud the things they want and the unlucky... well they end up like me, reading a book for half a day and then equating all their relationships to it.
Since I was so lazy yesterday I have to put in an unbelievable workout today. Yes, cause I want that bikini body all the women on TV have, amongst other things, and I am going to get them.
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Reading is the best way to travel on a shoestring and work our minds so we do not become feeble too early in life. To be so immersed in a story is to be that focused. Focus is the unraveling of a majority of people....not being able to focus gives us only a hint of the subject at hand, even just focusing for one day is a pattern you may be able to apply later on something else that may be of even greater importance. My my my...you did say you were in to self depreciation and I guess you're right. Well you tell the truth and that's awesome. Perhaps one day you will focus on all of who you yourself really are and all the worth you have at the very moment you are taking inventory of yourself and you will drop the curtain of low self esteem, it is like jealousy a very wasted emotional baggage that as years go on goes from looking 'like' passion to bitterness and self deceit.....
ReplyDeleteTo grow old gracefully (and we all grow old or die young)we have to begin somewhere being the most focused on our own good qualities and truly appreciate everything we bring to our own table(s). Sure go ahead and envy a little but don't go green cause once you do that there is very little chance you can easily reverse it....
I've helped myself by believing I am what I am, calm, cool and collected. Most the time I am but I am also human so yes I do get irritated by what others might hold over my head
and tell themselves "this is what you could have if you'd just be more this or that or just be different" thank God or whoever you choose to believe in , in a crisis, but I have something no one can con me out of, steal away from me or clone . The love and respect I owe myself in order to be a happy person.
A pair of shoes is meant for only one pair of feet. Unless I am being carried by another I must do my own walking, dancing and standing for who I am. Be yourself , the voyage begins now.