Day 112-115 of Singledom

Wow, what hasn't happened since I last wrote. Let's see, I had a mini happy hour party at one of my favorite bars and The Exes sister and a couple friends showed up, then Beer Pong Guy showed up. Thankfully he isn't big on PDA so no one really knew that we were "lightly hanging out" but they were all watching for a sign of some kind. The Exes sister asked me if I wanted to come to a dinner party the following evening which I accepted the invite but decided to wait til morning and say something had come up. We decided to go to another bar after happy hour ended with 2 other friends of mine and frankly I don't remember much there. I know I was trying to shoot pool and at one point me and another girl were doing shots at the bar, someone handed me a tequila shot and I handed it to my friend because tequila is off limits (whole nother story!) and almost immediately after she took it she projectile vomited across the bar. Yup, time to call it a night. Beer pong guy insisted on making sure I made it home ok in a cab and after telling him we could go to his house I changed my mind last minute and insisted on going to my house, he obliged and paid for my cab home. He is a really nice guy and I have to wonder why I am not ready to go pass the "lightly hanging out" stage but if it happens I guess it won't be the worst. Wow, that sounds terrible, kinda like settling which isn't nice to feel about anyone. The following morning we went to breakfast, again, easy conversation but...not sure if the spark is strong enough. That evening The Ex asked me if I was going to his sisters dinner party, that he would really like me there even though it was basically a family and close friend thing he thought if she invited me I should go. I went, had a great time with everyone, almost like I never left there little clan. Kinda made me sad after because it will never be the way it was before and having it like that, even for one night made me see that him and I are on two totally different places. He might be missing me and wanting the relationship back but I think I am enjoying this singledom a little more than in the beginning. I am free and shining for the moment.

Day 108-111 of Singledom

Crazy how fast things happen when your not paying attention. I landed the job I was vying for, pause for applaud, thank you thank you. It is going to make these next couple weeks at my present job the longest ever. I celebrated with The Ex at an Italian restaurant while romantically watching the Hawks game and having to repeat every other sentence because he wasn't listening. Ahhh, brings me back to when we were dating. Then we played a couple rounds of cornhole and of course I didn't win, just like my Hawks. The following day I had off and I did all my paperwork for new job, went for a run and then another friend of mine came over with a bottle of wine to celebrate me finally being able to leave my current job, which I do love just the company is atrocious. Beer pong guy had asked me to go to his softball game, almost didn't go, thought it was too much of a girlfriend thing to do and didn't want him getting the wrong idea but my buddy convinced me it would be fun and since we were going to dinner after we might as well save time by already being there. So I off I go. And guess what? It's totally a girlfriend thing to do. Everyone's wives or girlfriends were there, I was the only "friend". After numerous, How did you meet? and How long have you known each other? we finally got out of there to stop at his place so he could change for dinner. The apartment is gorgeous, huge and he has 3 other roommates, which he hates so he is moving out in the next couple weeks with another friend of his so it's not such a frat house. His room was the normal messy guy room, shoes, belts and underwear everywhere. Pictures of his family all over, kinda cute. Dinner was unbelievable. We went to my favorite BBQ place, Fat Willy's and when we sat down he asked me what kind of wine I liked, got a bottle and then ordered my favorite appetizer, corn fritters and then ribs. Conversation was really good, flowed nicely, he did unnerve me quite often by staring straight into my eyes often and doing the entwined hands thing like he is really taking in what your saying, made me a little nervous but overall was a great time. Afterwards he dropped me off and we made plans for Friday. That date could have only been made more all American with some beer. Not really feeling the butterflies but I am slightly excited to see him again, I have coined the phrase that sums up all my dating into "Lightly Hanging Out". Yup for now I like that.

Day 107 of Singledom

Chill sunday. Gotta love those. I usually work but was lazy and relaxed all day. Cleaned out my closet again, I can't believe how many clothes I have accumulated and I still want/need more. There is a fine line between what you need and what you want. Beer Pong Guy called me pretty late in the evening and said that he had gotten in earlier but passed out and wanted to know if we could meet for dinner another night. No problem. The Ex called and said he was back but going to watch the game with his dad could he come by later to bring me my souvenir. Umm. Yes. I like presents. Today is going to be the longest day ever, waiting to hear back from a hospital I interviewed at last week and keeping my fingers crossed that they chose me for the position. If not I have a backup plan but really hoping I wowed them at the interview. I hope they call early, either way, so I don't have to keep looking at my phone wondering if it's still working since it hasn't rung yet. Ugh, this is worse than when I was 14 and in love and waiting for him to call me. All I need now to top it off is a pimple!

Day 106 of Singledom

Last minute last night I decide to go out with one of my best guy friends and his buddy. We ended up at this bar that had about 4 women (including me) and about 50 guys. After the 3rd Madonna song and watching this really cute guy give my friend the up and down I realized it was gay night. When both my guys realized it about an hour later, because you know I didn't say anything just let them sit there and wonder where all the women were, they were jumping out of there seats! We head to the next bar down the street and after a couple shots there they decide they want hot dogs. My question is, where do the guy in the stand pee? It's cold and he's out there late, where does he pee? And where does he wash his hands? No hot dog for me! We got to the 3rd and last bar and grab a corner of a table and while I am dancing to myself this guy I went on a couple of dates 2yrs ago pops up. I can't remember his name but I do remember that he was a shithead. I kicked him out of a Christmas party we had at my place because he was obnoxious enough to think that he was spending the night at my house and then when I advised him he was not he then tried hitting on my passed out drunk friend. Yes. I said passed out. I flipped. She was sleeping in my room and I saw him walk in. His story was to "check on her". I call bullshit. Any guy that would do that is a piece of shit. So I made a scene and had him thrown out about 3 big cop friends of mine and he went running down the street. This guy even had the nerve to call me the following day apologizing and saying that it was a misunderstanding, he wasn't that type of guy. Funny part was my girlfriend said she partially remembers him going into the room and and thought what the hell but then heard me yelling and was like "it's ok, she has it covered" and went back to sleep. After all this I can't believe the guy would even speak to me. I did my best not to yell PERV! But was semi-cordial and did the shoulder move when he tried to hug me hello. This club/bar makes me not liking being single at all. Kinda looking forward to Beer Pong Guy coming back. And even The Ex a little, weird but having these non-relationships make it a lot less scary out there.

Day 104-105

Hating your job and having to wake up to it every morning is stressful. I know everyone feels this way at some point but this is just getting ridiculous. They cut our hours, take away our raises and don't seem to care that we have rent that needs to be paid. I am doing the paycheck to paycheck thing because there is no way to get ahead with this company. I have applied for hospital positions and think the interview went well so keeping my fingers crossed. I had coffee with the Angry Cop yesterday and he is still pretty much the same as I remember him, all looks no substance. In the evening went to see a movie at the Latino Film Festival with The Stalker, he was on his best behavior and we ended up having a great time. As long as he understands we are strictly friends at that is all we will ever be we have a great time. Tonight my girlfriends are getting together to go dancing. I haven't decided what I am doing yet but might stay in. I work late and work semi-early tomorrow. Hopefully today goes fast since I am working with this chauvinistic pig today. You can pick your friends but unfortunately not always your partners.

Day 103 of Singledom

It's so weird how the roaches come out of the woodwork. I took a coworker up on the idea of going to a Cubs game yesterday and for a buffer I brought one of my really good buddies who I have been friends with since I moved to this state. I had a feeling my coworker was a little disappointed to have another guy with so glad I did it because I am in no way interested in him. The game was great, we won thankfully or I might have had to beat up a Brewers fan on the way out, and I limited myself to two drinks while both guys proceeded to get smashed. Afterwords we went to Red Ivy which is an ok bar, met with some people and ate some food which the guys wanted no part in just more beer. By now both guys are drunk and I shove the coworker off in a cab and drove my buddies car back to his place which happens to be really close to mine so I was going to just walk home. In the car my buddy was texing his brother, now there is alot of history with his brother and I. We casually dated for 8months and I kinda blew him off for The Ex, to make the situation even stickier was that he was my landlord and lived in the same building as me so he knew the minute I was seeing someone else and would try causing issues between us. We will call him the Angry Cop. He was a really fun guy but that's about it. Someone you could party with and have a good time but not anything serious. Well, he shows up at my buddies as I am dropping him off and insists on giving me a lift home. My weakness is gorgeous men, they don't have to be all that smart but they can't be douchebags, just gorgeous and well meaning and I melt. He tells me he is recently single and was hoping maybe we could grab a coffee in morning. I told him no, I have to work maybe another day. Haven't decided if I really want to reopen that can of worms.

Day 102 of Singledom

Yesterday was the best. Easy calls, no foul smelling patients or nursing homes, got off work on time, an oddity in the EMS world. Halfway home The Ex wants to know if he can give me a ride, I tell him I am already walking but it he would like to pick me up that's fine. He made up some excuse about leaving his phone charger at my house, which I know he didn't, and wanted to check since he was leaving for fishing trip in couple hours. Amazingly enough it was not there and then he asked if I wanted to go for a bite to eat. We went to have appetizers and part way through he asked if I would miss him this week. The more I try to sit back and look from the outside in the more I realize how counterproductive our non-relationship is. When I get home I am talking to Beer Pong Guy about our plans for the evening and he is still packing for his trip and asked if he could just swing by for a quick coffee and then head out. I was ok with that since kinda worn out from seeing The Ex so we had coffee on my front porch and talked and when he gets back in town we will go for dinner. This is going to be a quiet week, I hope...