The higher these numbers get the more disheartening it is. I might just take my mom's advice on applying for the Bachelorette! Seriously though it is nice to have everything on your own time just but I really like the whole coupledom in a nutshell. Someone who cares about you and wants to know how you are doing and wants to do things with you.
Yesterday we took a 20yr old to a creepy mental facility, her crime was getting to drunk and telling her brother that she wanted to kill herself because her boyfriend was cheating on her with a friend. Thank goodness I never had siblings to rat me out. She didn't fall into the category of what we usually take and maybe there was something there that I didn't see but what I did see was a little girl who made a verbal mistake and was scared as shit going in there. Sucks. Once you utter those 5 little words "I want to kill myself" you no longer have a choice you are going in for observation. I guess better safe then sorry. But please don't say it unless you mean it, and actually the people who usually want to do it won't tell anyone, they just do it. Our minds are such a mystery. I could never understand how people could do something like that because I feel there is nothing that will ever break me to that point, but everyone's mentality is different.
I was so tired when I came home my plan was to hit the sack when I walked in. Which I did do. Then I started getting the calls and texes to go out, this bar or that bar. Damn I forgot that single people go out all the damn time! By 10pm I finally gave in, glammed up and went out with one of my ultra fabulous girls who must have a VIP pass implanted in her ass because everywhere we went she cut the line and got us in. I am not complaining. I had fun at the first club but by the 3rd my age started catching up with me... and my feet were throbbing, my thighs were burning even my bra was pissing me off. Not a fun combination. I managed to stay ultra sober, purely because it's easier to fight off the club douchebags with all your senses in play. I wonder why guys think it's attractive to come up to a girl dancing and grind. What's that about? I don't know you and I sure as hell don't want you rubbing whatever you have all over my dress. Overall I came home even more tired but the plus side is that counts as a workout so today I might just be lazy and sit on my couch and watch the Olympic Hockey game. USA USA!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Day 58 of Singledom
Bye Bye Liver. Clever and witty and right on point. I went to a comedy show after work last night with The Ex. It was great, an interactive drinking show that was way better than I was expecting. I love being surprised. The cast was on point with all their characters, my personal favorite being the guy who's girlfriend should not, under no circumstances drink tequila. That would be me. I steer clear, so clear that I don't even wanna smell the stuff, no only does it make me want to puke but I think if I actually drank it I would sprout horns and maybe a third breast... on my ass. Creepy right? Just not a good thing. Trust me. I'm not a lawyer so I am always telling you the truth.
Had a drink after the show and couldn't help noticing all the cute guys at the bar, again thinking that maybe I should not be spending so much time with The Ex. Not really keeping my options open if I am with him a majority of the time I go out because even though we aren't together I would not pick up another guy. That's too low for me... unless I had tequila.
Got me thinking though that maybe the whole spending time out should taper off a bit. I brought this up and it started a huge thing of how I can do whatever I feel is best for me but silly to not see him if we are trying to still remain friends and he understands if this is about another guy. Told him it's not... it's about all the guys that could be and the possibility that I could develop feelings for him again and don't want to. The main thing is that I don't want to get hurt again and he is still the same confused little boy he was 58 days ago. We want different things and we need different people to achieve those goals. It was overall depressing and sad conversation but I am glad we talked about it. We keep having these "We're not getting back together" and "Enjoying your company that's it" conversations but this was a little different. This one made me want to go have that shot of tequila. And damn the consequences.
Had a drink after the show and couldn't help noticing all the cute guys at the bar, again thinking that maybe I should not be spending so much time with The Ex. Not really keeping my options open if I am with him a majority of the time I go out because even though we aren't together I would not pick up another guy. That's too low for me... unless I had tequila.
Got me thinking though that maybe the whole spending time out should taper off a bit. I brought this up and it started a huge thing of how I can do whatever I feel is best for me but silly to not see him if we are trying to still remain friends and he understands if this is about another guy. Told him it's not... it's about all the guys that could be and the possibility that I could develop feelings for him again and don't want to. The main thing is that I don't want to get hurt again and he is still the same confused little boy he was 58 days ago. We want different things and we need different people to achieve those goals. It was overall depressing and sad conversation but I am glad we talked about it. We keep having these "We're not getting back together" and "Enjoying your company that's it" conversations but this was a little different. This one made me want to go have that shot of tequila. And damn the consequences.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Day 57 of Singledom
Have you ever gotten so embroiled in a book you couldn't put it down and when you did you could swear you just got done watching an episode of some show because the details were that vivid? Happened to me yesterday. No workout, no food, no cleaning, just ENVY. I read until my hands actually hurt from gripping the book. Made tea and alternated between holding the warm cup and the book. I finished it in less than a day.
Envy is such a great topic, everyone has something another person covets. Human nature. On TV, movies, real life we all want something another person has, just to what extent will we go to get it. Normal, I think we can generalize this, see something they want and try and attain it by setting there own personal goals. The non-normal take at any means which is usually the easiest route and the most harmful to the person who has. And then there is the lazy, the ones who may want something but don't want to put in the effort to achieve in either way.
I was thinking about this last night when I couldn't sleep about how this all relates to relationships, family, friends, girlfriends and boyfriends. The dominate will dominate and the weak follow. The lucky few have wonderful communication and project out loud the things they want and the unlucky... well they end up like me, reading a book for half a day and then equating all their relationships to it.
Since I was so lazy yesterday I have to put in an unbelievable workout today. Yes, cause I want that bikini body all the women on TV have, amongst other things, and I am going to get them.
Envy is such a great topic, everyone has something another person covets. Human nature. On TV, movies, real life we all want something another person has, just to what extent will we go to get it. Normal, I think we can generalize this, see something they want and try and attain it by setting there own personal goals. The non-normal take at any means which is usually the easiest route and the most harmful to the person who has. And then there is the lazy, the ones who may want something but don't want to put in the effort to achieve in either way.
I was thinking about this last night when I couldn't sleep about how this all relates to relationships, family, friends, girlfriends and boyfriends. The dominate will dominate and the weak follow. The lucky few have wonderful communication and project out loud the things they want and the unlucky... well they end up like me, reading a book for half a day and then equating all their relationships to it.
Since I was so lazy yesterday I have to put in an unbelievable workout today. Yes, cause I want that bikini body all the women on TV have, amongst other things, and I am going to get them.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Day 56 of Singledom
I love going out with people who don't have that filter in their brain that says when shit they say is totally inappropriate and when they need to stop talking. I have this guy friend who provides me with comic relief to a point. Then he just gets nasty and needs to go home, he has a 4 beer minimum. Think we need to change it to 3 because he got way outta hand last night with his over the top comments. He manages to offends every race, gender and probably an animal or two each time we go out. Funny thing though is when no one is around he can actually manage to be a pretty decent person, but that side doesn't normally make an appearance. It is always fun to talk with people and remember all the stupid shit you did and survived.
We went to People's Lounge for Tapas, extremely good and filling with one of the greatest Sangria's I've had in awhile. Then walked over to Salud where I shamelessly flirted with the hot, married bartender. He always serves us there and I have met his wife so it's all good fun and gets him a better tip, he knows what his he's doing. Smart man, using his looks to get the girls drooling and taking that money home to his wife. I need to start looking for a second job, bartending is the logical choice since that is one of my many trades and they are always hiring. It's lonely doing that job and not having anyone to come home to though.
Speaking of which I went to The Ex house last night, of course, cocktails and texing equals what people? Well... always nice to have someone there even if it isn't long term, the key is remembering that.
We went to People's Lounge for Tapas, extremely good and filling with one of the greatest Sangria's I've had in awhile. Then walked over to Salud where I shamelessly flirted with the hot, married bartender. He always serves us there and I have met his wife so it's all good fun and gets him a better tip, he knows what his he's doing. Smart man, using his looks to get the girls drooling and taking that money home to his wife. I need to start looking for a second job, bartending is the logical choice since that is one of my many trades and they are always hiring. It's lonely doing that job and not having anyone to come home to though.
Speaking of which I went to The Ex house last night, of course, cocktails and texing equals what people? Well... always nice to have someone there even if it isn't long term, the key is remembering that.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Day 55 of Singledom
I have been watching so many movies I feel like I should be getting paid for my critic's. I will tell you in advance if you have not seen Gamers then I am about to spoil the ending for you so pass this paragraph. I was highly excited and intrigued for the first hour of the movie. Kinda like Terminator, so much action but you still wanna see where the plot can take it. Well, it could have been better, my expectations were set a little high when I saw all the great actors in it, like John Leguizamo and my personal favorite Michael C. Hall, who I happen to have the hugest crush on and plays a seriously demented character in most of his roles but that makes me love him even more. Pure talent. Well, that didn't save it, fast forward to ending where some random guy says to our main character, "Well played Kable." What? Really? That movie was so cliche with gaming phrases and that was the one they thought was the best ending? I wanted to drop kick the director.
Before my harsh critic of Gamers I was sitting home, relaxing and enjoying the afterglow of working out with a cocktail, smelling the glorious smell of meatloaf cooking when The Ex calls and wants to hang out and watch a movie. Obviously I said sure, it was late but I was wide awake and agreed to meet him in couple hours. He had my favorite beer, which I never drink cause I hate beer but this beer is special, it's Peach, delicious and tastes like champagne. Nice gesture but now I am questioning all his niceties. I don't know why he is trying to see me more or do nice things for me but it has me on edge. Feel like I am spending to much time with him even though we have agreed that we were not getting back together and that when I meet someone else I can just tell him and we will go our separate ways but how am I supposed to meet anyone when hanging out with The Ex? I am enjoying myself so I shouldn't be worried about it but still... So today I have a mission, if only to make myself feel better and get back in the game. There is this gorgeous guy I have been wanting to hit on and unless I am way off base he is interested, so I will suck it up and ask him out. Last time I saw him I was with The Ex so I am assuming he is thinking I am taken and since I am not I should start acting like it, right?
Before my harsh critic of Gamers I was sitting home, relaxing and enjoying the afterglow of working out with a cocktail, smelling the glorious smell of meatloaf cooking when The Ex calls and wants to hang out and watch a movie. Obviously I said sure, it was late but I was wide awake and agreed to meet him in couple hours. He had my favorite beer, which I never drink cause I hate beer but this beer is special, it's Peach, delicious and tastes like champagne. Nice gesture but now I am questioning all his niceties. I don't know why he is trying to see me more or do nice things for me but it has me on edge. Feel like I am spending to much time with him even though we have agreed that we were not getting back together and that when I meet someone else I can just tell him and we will go our separate ways but how am I supposed to meet anyone when hanging out with The Ex? I am enjoying myself so I shouldn't be worried about it but still... So today I have a mission, if only to make myself feel better and get back in the game. There is this gorgeous guy I have been wanting to hit on and unless I am way off base he is interested, so I will suck it up and ask him out. Last time I saw him I was with The Ex so I am assuming he is thinking I am taken and since I am not I should start acting like it, right?
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Day 54 of Singledom
I love my psych patients, they always make me laugh. Either by there ridiculous antics that get them in the hospital in the first place or from the things they say when we are picking them up. For example, my patient yesterday tells me that I am a whore. The nurse was my pimp and then asked me if I would marry him. He said he wasn't going anywhere till I said yes. Seeing as this is my first proposal in a long time I had to think, is this what single life has done to me? Contemplating a marriage proposal from a psych patient? Naw. Not that desperate yet.
By the time I got home from work, took george out and made myself a partially undercooked burger I was ready for sleep. The Ex called to see if I was up for a movie and the thought of earlier in the day proposals made this one seem golden so I said yes. We watched Gamers, pretty good so far but I feel asleep halfway thru. Last night I dreamt I was trying on wedding dresses, ironic huh?
By the time I got home from work, took george out and made myself a partially undercooked burger I was ready for sleep. The Ex called to see if I was up for a movie and the thought of earlier in the day proposals made this one seem golden so I said yes. We watched Gamers, pretty good so far but I feel asleep halfway thru. Last night I dreamt I was trying on wedding dresses, ironic huh?
Monday, February 22, 2010
Day 53 of Singledom
So how many martini's is too many? I don't know. I lost count. I went to a vintage cocktail party at 3 and took a my go to guy whenever I need a date. Love bringing him places and he knows never to hit on me so it works perfectly. The house the party was at was in Beverly and they are all beautiful. Our host had a great spread with all the trimmings, including pomegranate martini's. Normally I don't partake in the flavored ones because they are too sweet and give you a stomachache and generally never a good idea, but I hadn't tried this brand so I had one. And then another, and another. The bartender was on a mission to get everyone to the point were they were spilling martini's and it worked. You would be sitting there, take a drink and he'd be by your side with the shaker filling you up. All in all it was a great night and I walked away with a beautiful Italian coat for only $20 and a headache that will last me all day.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Day 52 of Singledom
Viva La Mexico! Beer Olympian Kings and Queens here! We didn't actually win anything but I feel it's a personal goal to be able to leave one of those things still remembering what happened that night and not puking. We did kick ass in the costume competition. We went as politically incorrect as you can get. Green Uno Cards, Guadalupe candles, jalapeno air fresheners, sombreros and ponchos. Wholesome fun. There was some other other couples that had good costumes, Turkey showed up as actually Turkeys. South Africa came as diamond smugglers, Congo was Dr. Goodman and a gorilla. USA, wow, USA was gun toting, blatant cheating hicks. Overall it was a great day. Oh yeah, full day. From 12-10. Thankfully I had the bright insight to make Bruschetta, which was a feat itself (FYI those instructions that say Takes 10mins LIE) it turned out really well but had to disarm the fire alarms and will most likely be cleaning the oven for a couple weeks. If you ever attempt this recipe use less Olive Oil then they say, trust me. Blood, sweat and tears went into that dish and was chowed in about 15mins, but it was good, at least by drunk people standards.
It was really a blast and met alot of new people and was kinda strange pretending to be a couple but it's like putting on an old shoe, still fits just semi stiff in the beginning but then you remember either how much you loved it or why you don't wear it often.
It was really a blast and met alot of new people and was kinda strange pretending to be a couple but it's like putting on an old shoe, still fits just semi stiff in the beginning but then you remember either how much you loved it or why you don't wear it often.
Day 51 of Singledom
Long day at work as usual, needed to unwind and relax. Have a Beer Olympics thing to go to in morning, yes, morning. So I got home and took a hot bath, took a call from The Ex asking if I wanted to come by his place, he had gotten movies and something for me. Now I have to say, I am a sucker for presents and since earlier in the day we had already discussed how this was going to be a strictly hanging out, not getting back together type situation I felt comfortable going over. Funny how we have to keep reestablishing what our "Situation" is.
So in the spirit of Beer Olympics the following day he found me an Apple Cider beer that he thought I would like to practice on. I am not a huge beer drinking, as a matter of fact I am not a beer drinker at all. I prefer wine or whiskey. But the cider was good, and we watched Law Abiding Citizen, great movie, until the end. Once again, *Spoiler Alert* if you haven't watched it but I wanted Jamie Foxx to die in the end and Gerard to live to fight bad guys another day. Things are never how we want them, in life and movies.
So in the spirit of Beer Olympics the following day he found me an Apple Cider beer that he thought I would like to practice on. I am not a huge beer drinking, as a matter of fact I am not a beer drinker at all. I prefer wine or whiskey. But the cider was good, and we watched Law Abiding Citizen, great movie, until the end. Once again, *Spoiler Alert* if you haven't watched it but I wanted Jamie Foxx to die in the end and Gerard to live to fight bad guys another day. Things are never how we want them, in life and movies.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Day 50 of Singledom
What started out a a slow morning ended in a very cold and very long day. While showering my lights went out. First thought was there must be a power outage. Wrong, just my lights out, Comed came and did me wrong. My bill is paid so once I towel off I have a beef to pick with them. I was running short on time because I have to be perfect with the buses now that CTA has done all these cuts and if I am late for work by 1 minute you get suspended for a day. So while waiting for a Comed agent to call me back I call work and let them know I am running late, would it better to take a sick day or show up late. Funny thing is my job would prefer you have a sick day instead of showing up late. So I suck it up call off and continue to wait for Comed to call. When they do I informed that there was a disconnection because back in Dec. 2008 (when I was not living in the building) the heat/electricity was being ran till May 2009 when I moved in so since there was no name on the bill during that time and it's been over a year they disconnect WITHOUT sending any notices. I would have advised my landlord or paid it myself if I would have received notice. So I pay it, and want to know when they will be back. 1-3 business days. WHAT? It's already getting cold in my apt I have a fridge full of food and how in the hell will I be able to charge my phone, which is my life line, without an outlet? Now the real interesting part comes in if they don't get here by Friday I will have to wait til Monday. All weekend no heat or lights for something not my fault? I tried to do the honey thing, ya know you get more flies with honey than whatever the hell else it was... didn't work.
I call back and ever say "Look I have a newborn baby here, unsafe to live like this", nothing, those people are robots man! So I wrote a complaint and sent that off, I have been filing complaints all week, kinda humorous. I finally got someone of some sort of authority to contact me back and tell me there would be a work order out on Friday. Thank goodness!
My girlfriend comes over with some vodka and we pretend like we are in Russia, drink till your warm. I don't know how they do it but it only made my hands colder and myself hungry and the only thing I could make was salad because everything else had to be cooked and I have an electric stove. Bad idea. Then bright idea number 2, which actually was brilliant was to carry the microwave to the 2nd floor landing which has an outlet and make some food! Bingo! Crisis solved. Kinda like being in a college dorm and you eat popcorn for dinner.
Later that evening The Ex calls to see how I am and I tell him about the plight of the lights and he wants to pick me up so I don't have to sleep in the cold. I agree, I may be all for camping in the woods on a warm night but freezing in my house is not my idea of adventure!
I call back and ever say "Look I have a newborn baby here, unsafe to live like this", nothing, those people are robots man! So I wrote a complaint and sent that off, I have been filing complaints all week, kinda humorous. I finally got someone of some sort of authority to contact me back and tell me there would be a work order out on Friday. Thank goodness!
My girlfriend comes over with some vodka and we pretend like we are in Russia, drink till your warm. I don't know how they do it but it only made my hands colder and myself hungry and the only thing I could make was salad because everything else had to be cooked and I have an electric stove. Bad idea. Then bright idea number 2, which actually was brilliant was to carry the microwave to the 2nd floor landing which has an outlet and make some food! Bingo! Crisis solved. Kinda like being in a college dorm and you eat popcorn for dinner.
Later that evening The Ex calls to see how I am and I tell him about the plight of the lights and he wants to pick me up so I don't have to sleep in the cold. I agree, I may be all for camping in the woods on a warm night but freezing in my house is not my idea of adventure!
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Day 49 of Singledom
Yesterday was just a clusterfuck at work. If ever I needed a drink it was after a day like that. Our ambulance had no heat so we take it in to get it fixed, should be easy right? Wrong. Ends in us running a simple errand for the company that turned into both my partner and I in separate cars running out of gas 20miles from our destination and no gas cards in either vehicle. Pretty comical and outrageous. The even funnier part was when the company expected us to pay out of pocket for gas then submit a bill for repayment, which I know either takes a month or doesn't happen at all. Needless to say for all the little that this company does for us as employees I would rather run out of gas on side of road before putting a dollar of my own money into their tanks.
Once the situation was fixed, they had to send another crew to pay for gas, and errand was completed they gave us a new ambulance to check out. This ambulance was so old there was a layer of filth and dust piled on the cot so thick it took about half a box of Lysol wipes to clean and it still wasn't up to code. Half of the items needed were missing out of it and the stretcher had no straps, was ripped open on one side and the wheels were functioning like when I have one to many shots, wobbly and crooked.
After all this we still get held over a hour after our off time while other crews with later off times are being sent home. I won't complain though because that's extra money in my pocket but sometimes I wonder how dispatch was trained, surely not to be logical and give calls out in a fashion that makes sense, nope, just willy nilly, call here call, it's ok that you are no where near this but at least it's going to be taken care of.
Needless to say I skipped the much needed drink and went straight to bed, some days just never end.
Once the situation was fixed, they had to send another crew to pay for gas, and errand was completed they gave us a new ambulance to check out. This ambulance was so old there was a layer of filth and dust piled on the cot so thick it took about half a box of Lysol wipes to clean and it still wasn't up to code. Half of the items needed were missing out of it and the stretcher had no straps, was ripped open on one side and the wheels were functioning like when I have one to many shots, wobbly and crooked.
After all this we still get held over a hour after our off time while other crews with later off times are being sent home. I won't complain though because that's extra money in my pocket but sometimes I wonder how dispatch was trained, surely not to be logical and give calls out in a fashion that makes sense, nope, just willy nilly, call here call, it's ok that you are no where near this but at least it's going to be taken care of.
Needless to say I skipped the much needed drink and went straight to bed, some days just never end.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Day 48 of Singledom
Fat Tuesday, gotta love it just an excuse to drink on a Tuesday because some other state likes to party. I worked all day, had another lovely altercation with the same cop from couple weeks ago. This time he throws the siren on and is honking and yelling, mind you the whole time my patient is sitting in the stair shocked that the police officer is acting this way completely unprovoked, again! So end of story I got his car number and filed a complaint regarding his complete lack of regard for the patient that we were trying to safely get into rig. I doubt anything will come of it, it is Chicago after all.
After work I went home relaxed with my dog and contemplated going out for a cocktail with The Ex. After sitting in my house and realizing my only other choices were cleaning up or working out I took him up on his offer. We decided to see a movie, Valentine's Day, which was pretty good but (spoiler alert) I couldn't believe how terrible Julia Roberts looked and was shocked when I Bradley Cooper ended up being gay in the end. Didn't see that one coming! After movie we went to the spot called Revolutionary Brewery to eat. The menu was intricate, I got grilled chicken with arugula and garlic mashed potatoes and honey mustard sauce. Wonderful and wonderful. Followed it up with a couple vodka cranberries and it was a perfect dinner. The Ex wanted me to stay the night but I declined, appreciate the movie and dinner and as always great conversation but nothing has changed. I would have to sneak in and out and I feel that if you have to hide something you shouldn't be doing it.
After work I went home relaxed with my dog and contemplated going out for a cocktail with The Ex. After sitting in my house and realizing my only other choices were cleaning up or working out I took him up on his offer. We decided to see a movie, Valentine's Day, which was pretty good but (spoiler alert) I couldn't believe how terrible Julia Roberts looked and was shocked when I Bradley Cooper ended up being gay in the end. Didn't see that one coming! After movie we went to the spot called Revolutionary Brewery to eat. The menu was intricate, I got grilled chicken with arugula and garlic mashed potatoes and honey mustard sauce. Wonderful and wonderful. Followed it up with a couple vodka cranberries and it was a perfect dinner. The Ex wanted me to stay the night but I declined, appreciate the movie and dinner and as always great conversation but nothing has changed. I would have to sneak in and out and I feel that if you have to hide something you shouldn't be doing it.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Day 47 of Singledom
Home sweet home. As much fun as I had and as much as I loved seeing everyone it was only an expensive escape from reality. I guess that’s what all vacations are meant to be. I liked NY the first time I visited, this time I got to see more of the actual living and not just the tourist attractions and I see that I would not want to live there, I love Chicago, it’s my home.
Everything was Kosher out there, even my lollipop! The windows have cages on them and I saw kids playing inside the cages, strange and funny at same time. What the hell do they do if there is a fire? And don’t get me started on the garbage...
The High School Sweetheart wants me to come again, I wouldn’t mind visiting him again, he makes me laugh and remember when I was younger, I just am not sure if there would be an adult relationship there that is worth pursing. I don’t do long distance and I know he is very career orientated at this time so I don’t know if that would work. Time will tell. I’m not rushing anything.
After a horrendous flight through United that left everyone waiting originally an hour but once we got on the plane it was another hour with no air and a crying baby sitting next to me was definitely a downer to a great trip. I was more than ready to get home and sleep in my bed. The Ex picked me up from the airport and gave me a detailed itinerary of what he was up to over the weekend. I think he just wanted me to do the same. It’s weird, at times it feels like we are still together but I know we are not and 99% sure that we will not get back together but the closeness and easiness of being in a semi relationship is almost easier than not being in one at all. Fucked up situations. Maybe one day everything will be easier to sort out. Today just isn’t the day.
Everything was Kosher out there, even my lollipop! The windows have cages on them and I saw kids playing inside the cages, strange and funny at same time. What the hell do they do if there is a fire? And don’t get me started on the garbage...
The High School Sweetheart wants me to come again, I wouldn’t mind visiting him again, he makes me laugh and remember when I was younger, I just am not sure if there would be an adult relationship there that is worth pursing. I don’t do long distance and I know he is very career orientated at this time so I don’t know if that would work. Time will tell. I’m not rushing anything.
After a horrendous flight through United that left everyone waiting originally an hour but once we got on the plane it was another hour with no air and a crying baby sitting next to me was definitely a downer to a great trip. I was more than ready to get home and sleep in my bed. The Ex picked me up from the airport and gave me a detailed itinerary of what he was up to over the weekend. I think he just wanted me to do the same. It’s weird, at times it feels like we are still together but I know we are not and 99% sure that we will not get back together but the closeness and easiness of being in a semi relationship is almost easier than not being in one at all. Fucked up situations. Maybe one day everything will be easier to sort out. Today just isn’t the day.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Day 46 of Singledom
Valentines Day, you either love it or you hate it. I think I am undecided as of yet. The High School Sweetheart and myself got ditched by everyone else who decided to do their own thing. Kinda expected but even though we are just friends still felt a little pressured to do something special. I decided to make it an easy day, lunch out and then watch bad scary movies at his place. It was so much fun and then for dinner he made mac n cheese and we criticized the Masters of Horror collection on Net Flix. Kinda like old times were we would stay up all night watching movies and that made me remember all the things we had in common. It was really a special night.
The Engineer called to wish me a Happy Valentines Day. Actually his voicemail said "Flash and me" a reference he made quite a few times. I love my dog but I am not going to be leaving voice mails like that, slightly creepy. No return call needed.
The Ex sent me a text later in the day, letting me know he was thinking of me and that he would be there to pick me up from airport. I am excited to go home, this weekend has been fun but my liver is literally crying in a corner somewhere. I'm just not sure if I am excited to see him or just to be back. I have half a day left here and we are all going to hit up some sushi and saki and I am not thinking about anything else. At least till I get to the plane.
The Engineer called to wish me a Happy Valentines Day. Actually his voicemail said "Flash and me" a reference he made quite a few times. I love my dog but I am not going to be leaving voice mails like that, slightly creepy. No return call needed.
The Ex sent me a text later in the day, letting me know he was thinking of me and that he would be there to pick me up from airport. I am excited to go home, this weekend has been fun but my liver is literally crying in a corner somewhere. I'm just not sure if I am excited to see him or just to be back. I have half a day left here and we are all going to hit up some sushi and saki and I am not thinking about anything else. At least till I get to the plane.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Day 45 of Singeldom
We have all recuperated from our alcohol induced haze. Ordered cheeseburgers and slept most of the day away. Reminisced about high school days and how we thought we knew everything back then. Youth is so wasted on the young.
Around 9pm we get ready for round 2 and head to the Fat Black Pussy Cat Club. Seriously, that is the name. It's a 5am club, crowded and loud but still had a good time. Danced so much my legs are hurting and my lower back is throbbing. I am getting old. What a pain.
Sent out texts at 1am to my loved ones wishing them a Happy Valentines, oops, sent one to The Ex, he immediately responded back Happy Valentines and hopes I am having a blast. Ugh. Wish he wasn't so nice. Today has always been a special day and really miss him. Hopefully that feeling only lasts for the day.
Around 9pm we get ready for round 2 and head to the Fat Black Pussy Cat Club. Seriously, that is the name. It's a 5am club, crowded and loud but still had a good time. Danced so much my legs are hurting and my lower back is throbbing. I am getting old. What a pain.
Sent out texts at 1am to my loved ones wishing them a Happy Valentines, oops, sent one to The Ex, he immediately responded back Happy Valentines and hopes I am having a blast. Ugh. Wish he wasn't so nice. Today has always been a special day and really miss him. Hopefully that feeling only lasts for the day.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Day 43 of Singledom
First night in NY was hard. I am used to Chicago noises but NY noises are different. The apartments aren't as small as I thought but you can literally hear your neighbor's conversation from any room in the place. I know they had sex last night for the 1st time in awhile and were celebrating by making coffee, eggs and think it was hash browns, no meat cause they are vegetarians. TMI.
We chilled a bit last night, mimoso's when I first came in, that's my kind of "Hello NY" and then a couple vodka lemonades, some pizza and bullshitting. The guys I am visiting are so laid back there and remind me of when I was young. It's a nice change from being the responsible bill paying always working person that I have morphed into. Not that I mind. I like working and paying my bills on time. I work alot so I can play alot. I don't save much, which in the long run could be bad but when I see all my patients, old and young dying, I know they aren't thinking about how much money they have in there bank account, they are thinking about all the things they didn't do or didn't say and their loved ones. Yeah, they are always talking about their loved ones, either the ones still there or the ones that have already passed on. I want to be someone who did almost everything I wanted to do and has loved ones that will always remember, and I don't mind if it takes a photo or two to jog the memory. I like that moment were you look at a picture that in an instant you recall exactly what you were doing at that time.
Hey NY, say cheese!
We chilled a bit last night, mimoso's when I first came in, that's my kind of "Hello NY" and then a couple vodka lemonades, some pizza and bullshitting. The guys I am visiting are so laid back there and remind me of when I was young. It's a nice change from being the responsible bill paying always working person that I have morphed into. Not that I mind. I like working and paying my bills on time. I work alot so I can play alot. I don't save much, which in the long run could be bad but when I see all my patients, old and young dying, I know they aren't thinking about how much money they have in there bank account, they are thinking about all the things they didn't do or didn't say and their loved ones. Yeah, they are always talking about their loved ones, either the ones still there or the ones that have already passed on. I want to be someone who did almost everything I wanted to do and has loved ones that will always remember, and I don't mind if it takes a photo or two to jog the memory. I like that moment were you look at a picture that in an instant you recall exactly what you were doing at that time.
Hey NY, say cheese!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Day 42 of Singledom
Stair chairs are my own personal hell. You have to take someone up x amount of stairs carrying an O2 tank, foley and whatever other personal equipment this patient might need and they are never just a couple steps, usually the more carry on items the more flights you have to go. They are normally steep and slippery from all this wonderful snow that we have acquired in last couple of days. To whomever said "Let it snow" I say burn in hell where there is no snow.
I packed for my trip late, makes me minimize my load. If I pack to early then I have a tendency to add and add till I have an extra bag that I don't need. Then this new rule that the airlines have about checking a bag and paying an additional amount of $25 is ludicrous. I just paid $220 for a ticket and now your telling me that I have to give you more money and I don't even get my shitty little bag of peanuts anymore? No. I will cram as much as I can into my little carry on.
The Ex took me to the airport and is taking care of my lil george while I am gone. He does alot of nice sweet things for me that make me remember how it used to be but in the end I still feel that I would rather preserve the friendship and let the rest just kinda fade... I think. I hate being confused but whatever happens will and I can't predict the future. I just know that I am looking forward to NY and taking as little baggage as possible.
I packed for my trip late, makes me minimize my load. If I pack to early then I have a tendency to add and add till I have an extra bag that I don't need. Then this new rule that the airlines have about checking a bag and paying an additional amount of $25 is ludicrous. I just paid $220 for a ticket and now your telling me that I have to give you more money and I don't even get my shitty little bag of peanuts anymore? No. I will cram as much as I can into my little carry on.
The Ex took me to the airport and is taking care of my lil george while I am gone. He does alot of nice sweet things for me that make me remember how it used to be but in the end I still feel that I would rather preserve the friendship and let the rest just kinda fade... I think. I hate being confused but whatever happens will and I can't predict the future. I just know that I am looking forward to NY and taking as little baggage as possible.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
I don’t know which is worse. Watching someone you love slowly die a painful death and not being able to do anything about it or waking up one morning and finding out they are gone. I can’t imagine one would be better than the other. I get to see alot in my job and some days I feel for the family of the loved ones and hope that when my time comes I will have either a ton of people there able to tell me everything they ever wanted or no one there to mourn the moment I am gone and all the stuff they neglected to say.
I hate not saying everything I want and feel at the exact moment, sometimes I do but mostly I reserve myself. I’m not sure why we does this or what makes up think it’s better to keep things bottled up inside but you definitely miss out on alot when you keep your mouth shut. I am working on speaking my mind in a nicer manner, not sure if that will truly work but it’s nice to have a goal.
Last night I went to another movie with The Ex. I know, I know. No apologies, had a really good time. We saw Up In The Air with my husband to be George Clooney, it was better than I expected. Kinda sad though, made you think of what your life would be like all alone. Afterward we went to The Rocking Horse, awesome place, always said we wanted to go there and had these ridiculously yummy portabella fries. Man I love food. They had a picture booth in the back and we got our pictures done because I am a sucker for those booths no matter how much or how crappy the photo’s are I love them. I heard once pictures are for the people who can’t remember the good times. I don’t think so, I think it’s for the people that want to relive them.
I hate not saying everything I want and feel at the exact moment, sometimes I do but mostly I reserve myself. I’m not sure why we does this or what makes up think it’s better to keep things bottled up inside but you definitely miss out on alot when you keep your mouth shut. I am working on speaking my mind in a nicer manner, not sure if that will truly work but it’s nice to have a goal.
Last night I went to another movie with The Ex. I know, I know. No apologies, had a really good time. We saw Up In The Air with my husband to be George Clooney, it was better than I expected. Kinda sad though, made you think of what your life would be like all alone. Afterward we went to The Rocking Horse, awesome place, always said we wanted to go there and had these ridiculously yummy portabella fries. Man I love food. They had a picture booth in the back and we got our pictures done because I am a sucker for those booths no matter how much or how crappy the photo’s are I love them. I heard once pictures are for the people who can’t remember the good times. I don’t think so, I think it’s for the people that want to relive them.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Day 40 of Singledom
Mondays always suck. I hate them but yesterday was actually the best monday I have had in awhile. I got to work and had no partner so after an hour they sent me home to which I immediately took George out for a walk, made myself a martini and sat down to watch The Bad Girls Club. This show has me bewildered, they say they want these self proclaimed bad girls to learn life lessons but all the producers do is liquor them up and send them to clubs and allow themselves to make complete asses out of themselves. Great mindless entertainment for us but zero purpose for these girls. I would love to hear what some of them have to say in 15years when they have kids of there own who sees mommy whoring it up.
The Ex called and wanted to know if I was up for a movie and as tempting as another episode of Bad Girls Club was I opted for the movie, we ended up seeing 2 then having dinner. It was actually a great "non-date". He asked me if I missed him and I responded honestly, I do but not as much now. I didn't feel good this time seeing the pain in his face but it can't be helped, this is what he wanted. I will be there as a friend and for companionship like I would with any other friend. We talked about my upcoming trip and Valentines Day and he says he will just be hanging at the house or playing hockey if I want to call and say hi. I will. I try to call and tell everyone I love on Valentines that they are special to me, I cherish my friendships. No matter what form they started in or how they end.
The Ex called and wanted to know if I was up for a movie and as tempting as another episode of Bad Girls Club was I opted for the movie, we ended up seeing 2 then having dinner. It was actually a great "non-date". He asked me if I missed him and I responded honestly, I do but not as much now. I didn't feel good this time seeing the pain in his face but it can't be helped, this is what he wanted. I will be there as a friend and for companionship like I would with any other friend. We talked about my upcoming trip and Valentines Day and he says he will just be hanging at the house or playing hockey if I want to call and say hi. I will. I try to call and tell everyone I love on Valentines that they are special to me, I cherish my friendships. No matter what form they started in or how they end.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Day 39 of Singledom
Superbowl! Love it, love it, love it! For the first time ever I won in a pool and I didn't get drunk! Not for lack of trying, mind you. Sometimes you just have those days. I went to a really good guy friends house of mine, met a ton of people, ate like I was starving, enjoyed some fantastic wine and talked about Jersey Shore and Mike "The Situation's" abs throughout half time. Good times!
Honestly I only thought about The Ex once throughout the beginning of the game and semi missed him but I am sure I will feel that way on Valentines, my birthday, his birthday etc. Can't be helped, will happen but eventually I hope to have someone else to think about. Right as I am about to fall asleep he texts me telling me how he hopes I had fun and that he is sober and babysitting his best friend. Maybe I want to have coffee in the morning? I thought about not responding but I did anyway and told him I have alot to do, work out and wash my hair. Maybe another time. He just said ok, goodnight and now I feel semi obligated to do both this morning so I am not technically a liar.
Three more days of work and then my mini vacation will begin. I need it, I deserve it and I can't wait for it! I have always loved NY but never went to hang with my friends there so this is a new experience that I am really looking forward to. My high school sweetheart will be there and I have only seen him twice in the last 10years so this is another thing that's pretty exciting for me. He is a good friend of mine and he makes me laugh. I am hoping those moments of thinking of The Ex will fade away while I am gone. I truly would like to leave my heart in NY.
Honestly I only thought about The Ex once throughout the beginning of the game and semi missed him but I am sure I will feel that way on Valentines, my birthday, his birthday etc. Can't be helped, will happen but eventually I hope to have someone else to think about. Right as I am about to fall asleep he texts me telling me how he hopes I had fun and that he is sober and babysitting his best friend. Maybe I want to have coffee in the morning? I thought about not responding but I did anyway and told him I have alot to do, work out and wash my hair. Maybe another time. He just said ok, goodnight and now I feel semi obligated to do both this morning so I am not technically a liar.
Three more days of work and then my mini vacation will begin. I need it, I deserve it and I can't wait for it! I have always loved NY but never went to hang with my friends there so this is a new experience that I am really looking forward to. My high school sweetheart will be there and I have only seen him twice in the last 10years so this is another thing that's pretty exciting for me. He is a good friend of mine and he makes me laugh. I am hoping those moments of thinking of The Ex will fade away while I am gone. I truly would like to leave my heart in NY.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Day 38 of Singledom
Everyday at work I feel like I get more and more disgruntled. I try to keep that part of me that wants to scream at doctors, nurses and patients in check but the more I see the more I get annoyed. First off, when I pick up a patient from the hospital I am either taking him/her home or to a nursing facility, I would assume that someone has been around this patient in the last 2 hours to clear them for take off, right? No. I am constantly walking into a room with a patient who has clearly been sitting in his own piss and or feces for the last couple of hours. I will then contact the nurse and tell them that we will not take the patient till he is cleaned, diapered and on new sheets. Most are annoyed with having to find a CNA or someone else lowly to do the job but there are some other nurses who look ashamed for trying to discharge a patient that way and get in there and do it themselves. Unfortunately there is that 1 out of 10 times that we don't know until we have moved the patient that he/she is soiled and now has contaminated our cot.
As much as that irks me number 1 on my shit list is obese patients. I am not talking about just a little husky, I mean the 300plus club. I am sure I will offend some people but that isn't my intention, just stating my opinion of morbidly obese people who do not have any desire to help themselves the minute they see us but they can walk perfectly fine to the kitchen and make a sandwich or 2 or 3 prior to our arrival. I have had some obese patients who truly are sick and truly can't get up or move themselves, these patients are treated like any other sick patient I have. But there is quite a few that seem to think we are there to cater to them.
Yesterday our patient answered the door with a donut in his hand walking around the apartment looking for his snack bag to take to hospital with him. He wanted to go to hospital because he was short of breath. When we asked him if he could walk down the stairs to our cot he gave us this shocked look and said "I am short of breath, I can't walk around." What?! We had to wait for a lift assist (another crew that comes to help) for this 340lb man and he actually tried to get shitty with me when he found out my partner and myself wouldn't be able to do it alone, "Why can't you do your job by yourselves?" I told him our "JOB" is not to carry him down 2 flights of stairs because we are not working for a moving company. My "JOB" is to render aid to sick and possibly dying to ensure that they arrive to a higher level of care in a timely manner, now if he would like to roll himself down the stairs we could get the party started. Some people just don't appreciate brutal honesty.
As much as that irks me number 1 on my shit list is obese patients. I am not talking about just a little husky, I mean the 300plus club. I am sure I will offend some people but that isn't my intention, just stating my opinion of morbidly obese people who do not have any desire to help themselves the minute they see us but they can walk perfectly fine to the kitchen and make a sandwich or 2 or 3 prior to our arrival. I have had some obese patients who truly are sick and truly can't get up or move themselves, these patients are treated like any other sick patient I have. But there is quite a few that seem to think we are there to cater to them.
Yesterday our patient answered the door with a donut in his hand walking around the apartment looking for his snack bag to take to hospital with him. He wanted to go to hospital because he was short of breath. When we asked him if he could walk down the stairs to our cot he gave us this shocked look and said "I am short of breath, I can't walk around." What?! We had to wait for a lift assist (another crew that comes to help) for this 340lb man and he actually tried to get shitty with me when he found out my partner and myself wouldn't be able to do it alone, "Why can't you do your job by yourselves?" I told him our "JOB" is not to carry him down 2 flights of stairs because we are not working for a moving company. My "JOB" is to render aid to sick and possibly dying to ensure that they arrive to a higher level of care in a timely manner, now if he would like to roll himself down the stairs we could get the party started. Some people just don't appreciate brutal honesty.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Day 37 of Singledom
Where to begin. Well the beginning of the day started normal, ya know Pina Coladas and birthday wishes. Then it went downhill from there. When you get car sick, migraine, and throw up Mexican food (which really doesn't taste good second time around) it's probably a good idea to stay home. But as my lovely readers know that would just be too out of character for me to do the sensible thing. Instead I suck it up and have everyone over for "Girl's Night."
Mind you anytime we say "Girl's Night" there tends to be a crashing of sorts from all of our male friends. One guy told me he would come in a dress and crash the party so we might as well just invite him. As much as the pictures of that would be great fun to laugh over I don't think the bar I was planning on us going to would have allowed him in. We started out simple enough, couple drinks, couple shots, next thing I know one of my friends is puking in the bathroom, the bar and basically anywhere in her projectile path. Amazingly enough we did not get kicked out and we huddled her in the corner to sleep it off while we continued to dance. Now I know your thinking how horrible of friends we are not to have taken her home but I did try to send her back to my place with a secured spot on the bathroom floor but unfortunately one of our other friends was walking in as she was walking out and convinced her ride and her that she was ok to stay. So I was not babysitting and he got full duty for the night over the drunk sick girl. Cleaning his car out this morning I am sure he was wishing he had listened to me.
When I go dancing or to a bar I never purposely look to meet anyone, I'm not interested and if i come with a group I usually hang with just them for the whole night. There were a couple good looking guys but I was more into dancing then anything else. As much fun as I had being single really smacks you in the face at 3:30 when everyone is gone and your all alone.
Of course there was the occasional texts through the day from The Ex and me but no plans have been made and I am feeling good about not seeing him. I will miss him tomorrow, Superbowl was always a big deal for us but I am going to a good friends family party and ready to drink and eat my sorrows away. At least for tomorrow.
Mind you anytime we say "Girl's Night" there tends to be a crashing of sorts from all of our male friends. One guy told me he would come in a dress and crash the party so we might as well just invite him. As much as the pictures of that would be great fun to laugh over I don't think the bar I was planning on us going to would have allowed him in. We started out simple enough, couple drinks, couple shots, next thing I know one of my friends is puking in the bathroom, the bar and basically anywhere in her projectile path. Amazingly enough we did not get kicked out and we huddled her in the corner to sleep it off while we continued to dance. Now I know your thinking how horrible of friends we are not to have taken her home but I did try to send her back to my place with a secured spot on the bathroom floor but unfortunately one of our other friends was walking in as she was walking out and convinced her ride and her that she was ok to stay. So I was not babysitting and he got full duty for the night over the drunk sick girl. Cleaning his car out this morning I am sure he was wishing he had listened to me.
When I go dancing or to a bar I never purposely look to meet anyone, I'm not interested and if i come with a group I usually hang with just them for the whole night. There were a couple good looking guys but I was more into dancing then anything else. As much fun as I had being single really smacks you in the face at 3:30 when everyone is gone and your all alone.
Of course there was the occasional texts through the day from The Ex and me but no plans have been made and I am feeling good about not seeing him. I will miss him tomorrow, Superbowl was always a big deal for us but I am going to a good friends family party and ready to drink and eat my sorrows away. At least for tomorrow.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Day 36 of Singledom
Some days you love your partners, either at work or at home, and other days...well you just want to cockpunch them.
Yesterday we go into a hospital that I am at quite often and there is a certain security guard that has made it his job to hit on me each and every time we go in. Usually he starts with the "You still got that boyfriend?" To which I ALWAYS reply Yes. Well today when he starts his normal banter I am half listening and my partner pipes in, NOPE, no boyfriend for her anymore. Nice. Now I have a ex-marine-now-security-guard-wanna-be-secret-agent trying to get in my dirty polyester work pants and I am tired and ready for our shift to end so not in the best of moods.
I make these rash judgments on people and never really think twice about it, he could be a really nice guy but in my mind I just figure if you keep hitting on someone who has a boyfriend and you say you don't care that doesn't make you quality to me. Maybe it's persistence but I was to tired to listen to his game and left without giving him my number that he swears I will give to him next time I see him.
Another interesting fact I learned, very uncomfortably at same hospital was that The Ex had never informed one of his partners that we are no longer together, I didn't tell the guy cause he was in the middle of inviting us, as a couple, to a Beer Olympics, which I guess we, as a couple have already rsvp'd to. Interesting. People are funny, and sometimes they deserve cockpunch's.
Yesterday we go into a hospital that I am at quite often and there is a certain security guard that has made it his job to hit on me each and every time we go in. Usually he starts with the "You still got that boyfriend?" To which I ALWAYS reply Yes. Well today when he starts his normal banter I am half listening and my partner pipes in, NOPE, no boyfriend for her anymore. Nice. Now I have a ex-marine-now-security-guard-wanna-be-secret-agent trying to get in my dirty polyester work pants and I am tired and ready for our shift to end so not in the best of moods.
I make these rash judgments on people and never really think twice about it, he could be a really nice guy but in my mind I just figure if you keep hitting on someone who has a boyfriend and you say you don't care that doesn't make you quality to me. Maybe it's persistence but I was to tired to listen to his game and left without giving him my number that he swears I will give to him next time I see him.
Another interesting fact I learned, very uncomfortably at same hospital was that The Ex had never informed one of his partners that we are no longer together, I didn't tell the guy cause he was in the middle of inviting us, as a couple, to a Beer Olympics, which I guess we, as a couple have already rsvp'd to. Interesting. People are funny, and sometimes they deserve cockpunch's.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Day 35 of Singledom
Late last night we got an extremely racist and homophobic psych patient. Every other word out of his mouth was "Faggity" and he informed us that if you are standing within 40ft a gay person and they sneeze you WILL get AIDS. I must have missed that day in school. It was slightly amusing when my partner was trying to help him off the cot and I asked my male partner how his sick boyfriend was doing. I have a morbid sense of humor I know but you have never seen somebody move as fast at that patient!
I had a great chat with a friend of mine about moving on letting go of the past, how all baggage needs to get checked in order to start anew. I love the idea but in theory it is so much easier to just go with the flow for me. I know she is right about alot of the things we talked about and I am sure in retrospect I will be like Damn, why didn't I listen? But you know how that goes, we never listen to the good advice. This is just a prelude into me seeing The Ex last night. We just stayed up talking about everything but "us" and watching music videos, something we used to do in the beginning. No, we are not getting back together, or even trying but as I keep saying it's really hard to break that bond you have with someone.
I am supposed to see The Engineer tonight, but I think I will call and cancel. I work late again and don't feel like I have enough girlfriend time, might watch a movie with a good friend of mine who lives close and obsess about how in the world George Clooney gets better looking every year. I am seriously considering a move to Italy folks.
I had a great chat with a friend of mine about moving on letting go of the past, how all baggage needs to get checked in order to start anew. I love the idea but in theory it is so much easier to just go with the flow for me. I know she is right about alot of the things we talked about and I am sure in retrospect I will be like Damn, why didn't I listen? But you know how that goes, we never listen to the good advice. This is just a prelude into me seeing The Ex last night. We just stayed up talking about everything but "us" and watching music videos, something we used to do in the beginning. No, we are not getting back together, or even trying but as I keep saying it's really hard to break that bond you have with someone.
I am supposed to see The Engineer tonight, but I think I will call and cancel. I work late again and don't feel like I have enough girlfriend time, might watch a movie with a good friend of mine who lives close and obsess about how in the world George Clooney gets better looking every year. I am seriously considering a move to Italy folks.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Day 34 of Singledom
What is it about people's professions that make them want to power trip and take it out on someone in a lower position then them? I guess the saying is true, misery does love company.
Had a small incident with a cop yesterday who didn't like my parking job and proceeded to let me know this WHILE i'm loading a patient in my ambulance. There was more than enough room for him to get through, I could have blocked traffic but I didn't do that I left space for everyone. When I advised the officer of this he got extremely angry and ranted about how a "Smart Alleck" as myself won't tell him nothing and that he can write me a ticket, would I like that? I said "Go Ahead" to which he replied he would also call my company, again I said "That's fine. Ok." I would gladly take a day off work to contest a ticket from an asinine cop power tripping and harassing me while I am attending to a patient. After some more sputtering on his part he left and ironically about a minute later another cop comes down the same street and smiles at us, waves and waits holding traffic so we can get the patient in rig safely. Funny how some people wake up on the wrong side of the bed while others must have had their coffee. I laughed all day about it and love the fact that he will be pissed about the little girl who mouthed off to him while I now have a great story to tell. Thank you angry officer.
Had a small incident with a cop yesterday who didn't like my parking job and proceeded to let me know this WHILE i'm loading a patient in my ambulance. There was more than enough room for him to get through, I could have blocked traffic but I didn't do that I left space for everyone. When I advised the officer of this he got extremely angry and ranted about how a "Smart Alleck" as myself won't tell him nothing and that he can write me a ticket, would I like that? I said "Go Ahead" to which he replied he would also call my company, again I said "That's fine. Ok." I would gladly take a day off work to contest a ticket from an asinine cop power tripping and harassing me while I am attending to a patient. After some more sputtering on his part he left and ironically about a minute later another cop comes down the same street and smiles at us, waves and waits holding traffic so we can get the patient in rig safely. Funny how some people wake up on the wrong side of the bed while others must have had their coffee. I laughed all day about it and love the fact that he will be pissed about the little girl who mouthed off to him while I now have a great story to tell. Thank you angry officer.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Day 33 of Singledom
Fortunately yesterday some kind soul offered to take my crappy shift I picked up so I was free for the whole day. I lounged and slept and lounged some more than at 8am when I couldn't stand laying in bed anymore (I usually get up around 4:50 for work so 8am is alot of sleep for me) I take my dog out and guess who is calling bright and early to see if I am up for hanging out. My Ex. I answer and say ok, lets watch a movie and maybe grab some food. We opt to order take out and watch a comedy and had a really good time. He left before my daughter came home from school and all in all it was a good time.
I realize every other day that I should not be hanging out with him then I realize on the off days that we still enjoy each others company and that it shouldn't be off limits to hang out with someone who makes you laugh and basically is just fun to be around. We never broached the subject of our past relationship so maybe that's the key.
I am looking forward to getting to NY and just not thinking of anything other than enjoying the sights and friends. Unfortunately my best friend can't be there but it's ok, we will have to plan another trip to get together and have a strictly girl's weekend. I have so much to look forward to that I don't have time to look back, I like that feeling.
I realize every other day that I should not be hanging out with him then I realize on the off days that we still enjoy each others company and that it shouldn't be off limits to hang out with someone who makes you laugh and basically is just fun to be around. We never broached the subject of our past relationship so maybe that's the key.
I am looking forward to getting to NY and just not thinking of anything other than enjoying the sights and friends. Unfortunately my best friend can't be there but it's ok, we will have to plan another trip to get together and have a strictly girl's weekend. I have so much to look forward to that I don't have time to look back, I like that feeling.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Day 32 of Singledom
Work hard, play hard. Some days anyway. I had my fill of puppies and for the most part their annoying owners and wanted to do something fun after work. Watched The Invention of Lying which completely cracked me up. Also made me think, could you imagine a place were not only does not one lie but you tell the brutally honest truth with no regard to the other person? I could live there, I would be ecstatically happy to live there. All the bullshit pleasantries gone and down to the nitty gritty reality. Some days might be rough but overall you know where you stand with everyone truthfully. As it is now you have bad days and you never really know what people really think or feel about you and the ones who lie to you the most are usually the ones who are supposed to love you the best. Kinda fucked up ain't it?
Talked to The Engineer and he asked me to take the train to Milwaukee where his house is and have dinner, hang out and he would drive me back in morning. What? Umm, No. Sorry.
After the movie I hung out with a coworker, we had been out in groups before and when he asked if I wanted to grab a drink at this Ale House I have never been to I was up for it. He does a mean Rosie Perez accent and I wanted to keep the laughs going so I went. Funny how you work with someone and you think you know alot about the person then you find out you really didn't know jack and they happen to be super cool and hopefully a really good friend in the future. I like having guy friends, I always try to establish right away that I am not interested in anything romantic and then if they are still wanting to hang out it usually leads to a great friendship. Guys normally don't care who is coming out or where they are going or what activities they do they just want to have fun. I like that carefree mentality.
I also have this guilty pleasure for beer. I don't like it and I don't want to drink it but I love watching other people drink it and I like buying beer for the cool bottles. Another plus with going to ale houses are there are usually manly men there and that is another one of my guilty pleasures. While I am scoping out the hot men and the bar apparently I was being scoped out too. During our 3rd drink and reminiscing about the bullshit our exes put us through a very attractive girl walked up and handed me a napkin, "Call me" she says and walks away. My friend couldn't believe it, he was a stunned as me to see her name, phone number and email address. Wow. Us women have certainly gotten bold. As flattered as I was, and believe me I was because it's not everyday you get to upstage the nice looking guy next to you, I will not be calling her. Completely not interested in women but love the confidence she exuded when she came up to me. I am going to use a little of that for the next ale house I walk into. Watch out beer drinking manly men.
Talked to The Engineer and he asked me to take the train to Milwaukee where his house is and have dinner, hang out and he would drive me back in morning. What? Umm, No. Sorry.
After the movie I hung out with a coworker, we had been out in groups before and when he asked if I wanted to grab a drink at this Ale House I have never been to I was up for it. He does a mean Rosie Perez accent and I wanted to keep the laughs going so I went. Funny how you work with someone and you think you know alot about the person then you find out you really didn't know jack and they happen to be super cool and hopefully a really good friend in the future. I like having guy friends, I always try to establish right away that I am not interested in anything romantic and then if they are still wanting to hang out it usually leads to a great friendship. Guys normally don't care who is coming out or where they are going or what activities they do they just want to have fun. I like that carefree mentality.
I also have this guilty pleasure for beer. I don't like it and I don't want to drink it but I love watching other people drink it and I like buying beer for the cool bottles. Another plus with going to ale houses are there are usually manly men there and that is another one of my guilty pleasures. While I am scoping out the hot men and the bar apparently I was being scoped out too. During our 3rd drink and reminiscing about the bullshit our exes put us through a very attractive girl walked up and handed me a napkin, "Call me" she says and walks away. My friend couldn't believe it, he was a stunned as me to see her name, phone number and email address. Wow. Us women have certainly gotten bold. As flattered as I was, and believe me I was because it's not everyday you get to upstage the nice looking guy next to you, I will not be calling her. Completely not interested in women but love the confidence she exuded when she came up to me. I am going to use a little of that for the next ale house I walk into. Watch out beer drinking manly men.
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